Wednesday, September 21, 2005

By The Way

A few thoughts:

By the way,
Kanye West recently said, among other things, “George Bush doesn’t care about black people.”

Kanye is complicating things.

All he needed to say is
“George Bush doesn’t care”

Unless you insert “about all his oil/pharma buddies” at the end, the statement pretty much rings true all by itself for everything I can think of.

By the way,
Have you noticed how Presidents always try to take credit for the Economy when it’s good?

When the Economy is bad, that’s the fault of natural disasters, market forces, dumb investors, isolated energy scandals, etc.

Still, you hear the candidates and pundits say:
“Daddy Bush passed on such-and-such economy to Dirty Clinton, Dirty Clinton passed on such-and-such economy to Little Bush, now Lil’ Bush’s Economy is such-and-such”

By the way,
where is the Economy anyhow? I’ve been looking for that sucker for damn near five years and I haven’t found him yet. I looked all over City Hall and I didn’t see him. I sent a buddy to D.C. but they must have passed each other on the way up. I even went over to the state Supreme Court, and when they didn’t have his records I drove all around Des Moines shouting “Eeeeconnnomeee."
He never showed.

If I ever find the Economy, I’m gonna tell him to straighten up and fly right; quit jerking us schlubs around, you know.
I’m gonna say, “Economy! Stupid! Quit playing this bullshit! And give me some money!”

But I’ve got a feeling the Economy is a little bit like Santa Claus and Unicorns and other people’s Gods– just another figment of the imagination. I know a lot of people believe in the Economy, but not a one I’ve asked has ever seen him.

By the way,
I heard second-hand FEMA is paying truckers $4 per mile to drive for Hurricane relief efforts. Where can I get a job application and when’s the next CDL test?

By the way,
John Kerry doesn’t care.

By the way,
In the wilderness, you are not at the top of the food chain.

By the way,
You can’t take it with you when you die.

By the way,
Fascism is not just a government. It’s a mindset.
There are only two places you have to get special permission to go to the bathroom – in prison and in school.

Buy the weigh.
Seriously, just buy it.
And some Kurds too.
But watch out for them tuffets and camel spiders, Miss Muffett.

And if you see the Economy, give him my message, won’t you?.



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